I wrote this song in the 90s, inspired by a Jacob Lake Inn co-worker who said she was surprised I could play the guitar but didn’t like country music.

(For the record, I do like “old time” country music – Kenny Rogers, Hank Williams, Buck Owens, Willie Nelson, etc. – but pop country hurts my ears and feelings.)

My aunt asked for a video of it. She’s the number one (and possibly only) fan of my YouTube channel.

Main vocals and guitar recorded on my new favorite mic: Shure MV5.

Lyrics:

I’d write a country song but I’ve never been that sad.
I’d write a country song but I’ve never been that mad.
I’ve never been that drunk,
I’ve never had a pickup truck.

I’d sing about my dog but I haven’t got a dog,
No wife to turn me on or she’d make a pretty song.
Never really been in a fight
Or let some cards keep me up all night.

Never tried no chewing tobacco,
There’s no white circle in my back pocket.
I look like a fool in Wranglers, chaps, and a western hat
But who doesn’t?

Don’t have a name like Clem or Wayne or Clint or Garth.
I just can’t sing like them, how can I win your heart?
I’ll do ‘most anything
As long as I don’t have to sing

Can’t write no country song, my grammar’s much too straight,
But I’ll hold you all night long, that country song can wait.